I’ve often thought that the term “celebration of life” was a bit of a spin job, designed to make us all feel better about someone’s death. After all, grieving and celebrating seem like natural antonyms of each other.
I stand corrected after attending my late friend, Suzanne’s, Celebration of Life this past Saturday. Suzanne died unexpectedly on December 18th from a massive stroke and I, like most of the large crowd in attendance at Holy Trinity Episcopal Church on Saturday, still couldn’t believe that such a bright spirit had simply vanished.
The mournful tones of a lone bagpiper washed over me as soon as I opened my car door and my face was wet with tears before I even made my way inside the church. There would be many more tears but mostly ones of abundant joy for having been in the circle of such an extraordinary human being.
Suzanne’s celebration of life had it all – gorgeous music performed by her beloved Bel Canto chorus, a tender and funny eulogy delivered by a dear friend, and an inspiring homily given by a minister who seemed to know her heart and her struggles.
I smiled throughout her eulogy as I learned so much about my friend that I never knew – including a hilarious story about her being surprised by an earnest pack of Webelos while skinny-dipping in a Texas pond one hot summer’s day. I could almost hear what the minister described as Suzanne’s “unfettered peels of laughter” chiming in with the rest of us as the story unfolded.
I learned that she was a “devoted encourager” often writing notes to young people, particularly those pursuing a career in the arts, and often enclosing a check with her kind words. I smiled as I remembered receiving such a note in support of Triad Health Project, the non-profit that I work for.
I really hope I saved that note.
I smiled again when I heard her described as “swift to love” and that she was known for her “constant practice of generosity.”
To know Suzanne was to also know her passionate love of music, particularly choral music and this music was the soul of her service on Saturday. So it was perfect when the Bel Canto company, her singers, many singing through tears, performed In Paradisum from Maurice Durufle’s Requiem, Op. 9 before Suzanne’s ashes were committed to the columbarium at Holy Trinity. This achingly beautiful piece translates from the Latin as “Into Paradise” and includes these lyrics:
“May the angels lead you into paradise; may the martyrs come to welcome you and take you to the holy city, the new and eternal Jerusalem. May choirs of angels welcome you and lead you to the bosom of Abraham.”
Choirs of angels – yes, nothing else would do for Suzanne Goddard’s arrival.
And may her celestial concert series commence. Brava, dear woman!
This is just beautiful, Sugar. I’m crying just a little. Her daughter will love it.
Sent from my iPhone
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I’m sorry you lost such a special friend, Addison. Your post makes me wish I’d known her.
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Robin – you would have really liked her. She was a “broad” in the best sense of the word!
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Lovely Addy, just lovely.
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She looks like such a sweet person. She just radiates with joy in all the pictures of her that you shared.
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It has been so interesting for me to process her death. We were not close friends but she had a profound influence on my life that I am so very grateful for.
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Thank you, Addison, for attending the funeral. It really was the musical tribute that she wanted. And the ‘profound influence’ you describe was in evidence everywhere that day. So many people that my mom reached out to and enveloped in love and support were there to give it back to her. On Saturday, no one could doubt that she was someone unusual and precious for her time on earth. Thank you for journaling about it. Your blogs were an unanticipated way for us to process our grief. I’m sure in the coming days and weeks I’ll return to them again and again.
All my best, Gayle
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Oh, Gayle, I would not have missed it for the world. It was truly an amazing celebration of an amazing life force. I feel so blessed to have known her and she has influenced my life in some profound ways. I’ve been thinking of you all a lot and praying that peace and comfort will find you in the days ahead.
Thank you so much for your kind words – you have no idea what they mean to me.
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